Wait For Me
by PunkyPenguin
Summary: "What if I were to disappear tomorrow? What would you do?" Otabek had asked. Yuri hadn't taken the question seriously, but suddenly Otabek was more than a friend. But before Yuri can get used to the idea, his life is turned upside down, and Otabek is nowhere to be found.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** Hi guys, and welcome to a new AU!

Just a few small things on this:  
\- Yuri and Otabek both live in Almaty  
\- Yuri is of age (16)

This is the first request I've ever gotten, and I'm very happy to be able to write this for her! I hope you enjoy this, Shiranai Atsune  
Enjoy!~

* * *

 **Wait For Me**

It was an evening like many before. Yuri had made himself comfortable on the large, dark leather sofa in Otabek's living room, his knees pulled up to his chest. Their favorite pizza – extra pepperoni and mushrooms – was waiting for them on the coffee table in front of Yuri while Otabek was off in the kitchen, fetching both of them a drink. The TV on the wall was stuck on the starting screen of Mario Kart, the happy, upbeat music the only sound in Otabek's small, single bedroom apartment.

Yuri smiled as he watched Otabek move around in the kitchen. Over the years, he'd gotten used to this, their routine. Otabek had been his friend for as long as he could remember; ever since Yuri was four and he and his mom had moved into the same apartment complex as Otabek's family after the divorce, Otabek had been in his life. Being two years older hadn't seemed to bother Otabek. In fact, he'd always stood up for Yuri over the years. He'd been one of the few people to accept him exactly for who he really was: a moody, insecure teenager, rejecting everyone's company but Otabek's.

Otabek had been the only steady force in his life as Yuri's mom had worked multiple jobs in order to keep up with the bills. And apparently Otabek had felt the same way about Yuri, because when Otabek's parents wanted to move to a more spacious and safe home in the countryside a little over two years ago, Otabek had refused. Instead, he'd stayed behind, living on his own at the age of sixteen – ignoring the dangers of living by himself in a pretty shady part of Almaty.

Almost every day, Yuri would wait for Otabek to get home from school, until Otabek had nonchalantly tossed him a copy of the front door keys one day, saying Yuri might as well have one. Yuri had been overjoyed, and Otabek's house had been more of a home than his own from that moment on. Yet over the past few months Yuri had found himself back at his actual house more often, while Otabek studied for his exams during the last year of high school. He hadn't wanted to distract his friend, knowing Otabek would jump at every chance he got to spend time with Yuri. However, their weekly game nights on Friday and Saturday had remained. Many had already passed, and Yuri was absolutely sure that many more would come.

"Here you go," Otabek broke Yuri from his thoughts when he was handed a can of Vanilla Coke as Otabek sat down next to him, the new weight making the couch shift.

"Thanks, Beka. You know you don't have to stockpile these for me, right? I know you hate them," Yuri replied as he took the can with a smile. He instantly opened it and took a sip before reaching over and placing it next to the open pizza box on the table.

Otabek smirked at Yuri. That familiar smirk that held the promise of a full smile if only he allowed it. It was one of things about Otabek that made Yuri's heart beat a little faster each time he saw it. Mostly because generally that 'smile' was only meant for Yuri's eyes.

"I like taking care of you," was all Otabek said as he grabbed the controllers to his console and tossed one to Yuri, eyes on the TV screen in front of them.

Yuri felt his cheeks heat up involuntarily and instinctively dropped his head a little. He accepted the controller wordlessly and was glad that his hair was partially hiding his face on the side where Otabek was sitting.

Lately Otabek had been having that effect on him. Whenever he said things like that, Yuri's cheeks would flush and he would feel his heart flutter. He found it quite annoying, really. At first he had no idea what was the matter with him, but the longer it went on, the more it had become clear to him: he wanted Otabek to be more than just a friend.

"Whatever." Yuri puffed out his cheeks in a pout, and from Otabek's chuckle coming from right beside him, the older boy must have noticed. Which obviously only caused his cheeks to flush harder, and for Yuri to mentally curse his hormones.

Yuri was glad Otabek didn't comment on it any further, and instead hit 'start' on the game. Yuri had lost count on how many times they'd already played Mario Kart together, but could count the times he'd beaten Otabek on both his hands.

Somehow Otabek had a real talent for gaming, and was nearly impossible to beat. There were times when Yuri had been so frustrated with his friend that he'd thrown the controller at his head and stomped off to the small balcony on the backside of the apartment, just to get some air and cool off. Afterwards he'd come back, head hanging in shame as he apologized to Otabek for losing his shit. Yet Otabek never got mad at him and always told him that it was okay and that he was a pretty sore loser himself too.

 _"Yeah right. Easy to say when you never lose,"_ Yuri had thought. Especially because the rare times that he beat Otabek, he had been cheering for Yuri.

But tonight was different. Otabek didn't seem his usual self. He drove his character into walls or off the course a numerous amount of times. He even managed to get hit by a fair amount of slippery banana peels that could have been easily avoided.

Though Yuri had felt victorious the first few times he'd won and rubbed it in Otabek's face, the sheer lack of enthusiasm as the night continued was starting to worry him. Everything about Otabek suddenly seemed off: the way he was staring blindly at the screen, looking but not seeing; sighing whenever he messed up – and _knew_ he messed up; the light slump in his shoulders and the frown permanently stuck between his eyebrows. And when Otabek just _sat_ there and didn't move when their next game started, Yuri had about as much as he could take.

With a growl, Yuri tossed his own controller onto the floor and snatched the one Otabek was using from his hands. Otabek's eyes widened as he seemed to snap out of whatever daze he had been stuck in, and his brown orbs snapped up to meet Yuri's angry, vibrant green ones.

"Yura? What's wrong?," Otabek asked. His voice was a little unsteady and insecure, as if he himself had no clue what Yuri was mad about.

"Don't give me that shit, Beka! You've been losing games nonstop and barely saying a word, and it's starting to piss me off! So fucking tell me what's wrong or I'm going home," Yuri responded harshly. The words came out of his mouth much more frustrated than he had meant for them to be, but he was beyond done with his friend's behavior. He knew Otabek could be the quiet, sulking type when he had something on his mind, but this was just ridiculous.

Otabek let out a deep sigh and slouched back against the couch. Yuri frowned as Otabek brought a hand up to his forehead and lightly rubbed the skin before threading his fingers back through his dark locks and closed his eyes. Yuri could practically feel the tension humming through Otabek as he watched him take a few deep breaths.

Yuri was worried. Through all the years he'd known Otabek, he'd never seen his friend so conflicted. Slowly he turned his head to look at Yuri, and his eyes were slightly unfocused. At any other moment, Yuri would have thought he looked sexy; blurred eyes, messy hair, mouth slightly agape as he tried to formulate his words, and draped back against the couch. But not now. Now it only showed Yuri how lost Otabek was. In return, Yuri's chest tightened in concern.

After a few careful tries of opening and closing his mouth, Otabek finally sighed and averted his eyes.

"You're right, I'm sorry," Otabek mumbled in defeat and sat up, resting his arms on his thighs as he kept his eyes glued on the TV screen. "I'm close to failing math, just because I screwed up on a few important tests. If I don't do well on the next test, I most likely won't be accepted into the university I want to go to."

Yuri frowned. Really, that's what had Otabek's panties in a bunch? That's what he'd been so upset about all night? He could have just told him, and Yuri would have understood. He knew Otabek was trying his best to get accepted into the International Information Technology University in Almaty, because apparently he really wanted to get into computer science. Yuri had never seen the appeal of it, nor understood anything about it, but he'd always enjoyed listening to Otabek talk about things related to the subject.

Otabek was trying his best to make a future for himself, while Yuri was failing pretty much all his classes just because he couldn't be bothered to pay attention. He'd gotten used to winging whatever test was thrown at him. Sometimes it worked out, and most of the time it didn't. Yuri figured he'd just see whatever life brought him. If necessary, he could always work multiple jobs like his mom. He had no plans of starting a family of his own, so it should be pretty easy to provide for himself. Yet Otabek was the complete opposite, and the fact that he tried so hard while Yuri was slacking made Yuri feel horrible.

"Damn it, Beka, you should have told me sooner. I wouldn't have bothered you so much," Yuri replied after a few seconds of silence, a slight frown still present between his eyes. Really, Otabek should have said something if he needed more time to study.

"I know, but I like having you around. This place doesn't feel like home when you're not here," Otabek softly spoke, and Yuri swore he could see a light blush dusting those caramel-colored cheekbones. His eyes were still fixed on 'Game Over' flashing on the TV as his lips lightly curled into a smirk. "Even if you're loud and steal all the good food."

Yuri blinked stupidly as Otabek glanced at him from the corner of his eyes, that damn smirk still plastered on his face. Yuri had been ready to say something sappy in return. Something along the lines of _"You are the only home I need"_ , but Otabek had ruined the moment with the added remark.

So instead of saying something sweet that _could_ have been a hint for Otabek on how Yuri felt about him, Yuri kicked Otabek off the couch with a hard, deliberate shove to his hips. Otabek yelped as Yuri's foot dug into the side of his body and knocked him to his knees on the floor. At least his friend had the decency to look shocked when his dark eyes rolled up at Yuri, and Yuri glared down at him.

Since Yuri couldn't tell Otabek the reason behind his glare _or_ the pout that followed – because confessing his love to someone he'd known for so long just wasn't on his schedule today – he huffed and crossed his arms over his chest, much to Otabek's amusement, whose mouth instantly curled into a light smirk as he slipped back onto the couch.

"Shut up and play with me, Beka," Yuri huffed as he stretched his body to grab his controller off the floor. His cheeks heated up lightly at his own words. _"Mario Kart, obviously,"_ Yuri added in his head, but from the way a dark chuckle fell past Otabek's lips, he could tell the damage was already done.

As embarrassed as Yuri felt, he was also relieved. Now that Otabek had shared his worries with Yuri, he seemed a different man. It was like a weight had fallen off his shoulders and he could breathe again. It made the tightness in Yuri's chest melt away like ice cream on a sunny day.

The rest of the night was spent like one of many they'd shared before. Their pizza was long gone, empty cans of soda were scattered across the table, and light touches and friendly shoves were exchanged as Otabek looked _and_ played like his normal self again. As Otabek switched off his Wii, he'd already caught up and surpassed Yuri's earlier winning streak. Damn that guy.

Yuri was about ready to go home, toeing his shoes back on while Otabek cleaned up the mess they'd made. Silently he walked to the kitchen and tossed the stack of empty cans into the trash and placed the empty pizza box on the kitchen counter, too large to fit in Otabek's trash can.

With a shrug of his shoulders, Yuri put his black jacket on, zipping it up and pulling the hood over his head. For some reason he always enjoyed the minor sense of security it gave him, hiding his face behind his hair and in the hood of his jacket. It kept him safe from the random people who would want to exchange words with him on the streets or at school. It kept them at a safe distance; a distance that only Otabek was allowed to breach.

"I'll pop in tomorrow, yes? Don't miss me too much while I'm gone," Yuri joked as he made his way to the front door, one hand stuffed into his pocket and the other one raised in a small goodbye wave to Otabek.

Instead of replying, Otabek stayed silent, and for a second Yuri wondered if Otabek had even heard his words. With a glance he looked back over his shoulder, and found Otabek standing much closer to him than he originally thought, only a foot away. Wasn't the man only _just_ in the kitchen, and when had he moved? Yuri scowled lightly and was about to tell his friend to not scare him like that, when he noticed the look in Otabek's eyes: sad, hollow, like he was on the verge of tears and barely able to hold them back. It made Yuri's breath catch in his throat.

"B-beka?" Yuri asked, not sure what to make of the scene in front of him. Whatever the deal was with Otabek tonight, it was scaring him. Sure, he had seen Otabek in tears before, after his parents had left and he wasn't able to handle the silence and loneliness quite so well, but nothing like this. Never like this.

Otabek turned his dark, chocolate eyes to Yuri, and Yuri could see a small light flicker behind the sullen look. As if someone had suddenly flipped a switch in Otabek's head that made his gears work again and brought him back to life. However, it did nothing to ease the tightness Yuri felt in his chest. Not even when he felt the soft touch of Otabek's fingers slide around his wrist and gently grip it.

"Yuri, there's something I want to ask you," Otabek said as he averted his eyes down to where his hand was wrapped around Yuri's wrist.

The warmth of Otabek's hand made Yuri's skin tingle. Deep down a thought of wonder flashed through him of what it would be like to feel that warmth on places Otabek had never touched before, but this was not the time to let such thoughts distract him. His best friend, his only friend, was clearly troubled by something, so he did the only thing he could think of and nodded.

"What is it, Beka?" Yuri had to swallow past the lump that had suddenly formed in his throat.

With a soft sigh, voice hushed, Otabek responded, "What if I were to disappear tomorrow? What would you do?"

Green orbs blinked up at Otabek once, then twice. When blinking didn't seem to help him make sense of the strange question, he frowned. It still did nothing for him. Where the hell did such a question even come from? It wasn't like Otabek to ask 'what if' question, especially not such strange ones.

"Shut up, Beka. You're not disappearing, _no one_ is disappearing, okay?" Yuri eventually said with a slightly annoyed ring to his voice. This had to be some kind of messed up joke Otabek was playing on him, there was no other way to explain it. Yuri chose to ignore that fact that messing with him like that was something Otabek would never do.

"I'm serious, Yura. Please?" Otabek's voice held a slight tone of desperation in it. His eyes rolled up to meet Yuri's and the grip around his wrist became _just_ a bit more pressing.

Yuri didn't answer. He _had_ no answer. Because this whole thing was just too ridiculous to even come up with an answer. Instead, he rolled his eyes and turned to face his friend.

"Fine, what would you do then?" The words came out his mouth harsher than he'd meant them to, but he was tired of whatever game Otabek was playing.

Yuri saw something flash through Otabek's eyes; a thought, an emotion – he wasn't exactly sure, and it was gone before he could grasp what it was or if it was even real at all. However, what was very real was the gentle way Otabek moved closer to him, his eyes seemingly darker in the artificial light of the apartment. Yuri refused to look away, even when Otabek was close enough for the fronts of their shirts to touch. Something about the look the elder was giving him had captivated Yuri and made his heart race.

As Otabek stilled himself only a few inches from Yuri's face, he was convinced his friend could heart his heart racing in his chest. The hand around Yuri's wrist slowly moved up his arm until it rested on top of his shoulder, as Otabek's other hand was placed on the opposite one, boxing Yuri into his grasp. The heat that came off them seemed to radiate through Yuri's sweater and spread through his body, setting his cheeks on fire, especially at Otabek's next words.

"I'd kiss you and tell you I love you."

Those words made Yuri's blush flare up to the tips of his ears and down to his chest. Again Yuri was glad he was wearing the jacket, as it hid everything but his burning cheeks. His heart felt like it would jump out of his chest at any moment, but instead of accepting Otabek's words for exactly what they were, Yuri felt a twinge of anger rise up from his stomach. How dare Otabek say such things?

Yuri was about to snap back with a snarky remark when both of Otabek's hands grabbed the edges of the black hood on his head and gently tugged him forward, softly brushing his lips against Yuri's. Green eyes widened for just a second, Yuri's body frozen in place. This had to be a dream. It wasn't exactly a kiss, not yet. Even though Otabek held him close, Yuri knew that the older boy was letting him control the next step. But Yuri would be damned if he ended something he'd wanted for so long, no matter how surreal it felt.

So Yuri's hands gripped the front of Otabek's shirt and pulled him closer, turning the promise of a kiss into an actual kiss. Hesitantly his lips moved against his friend's as his eyes fluttered shut. He could feel Otabek let out a deep breath against his cheek, as if he'd been holding it in while he waited for Yuri's reaction. The strong hands on the edge of his hood tightened and held him firmly in place as Otabek lightly moved his lips against Yuri's.

It was his first kiss; their first kiss. It was probably Otabek's first kiss too. But it felt like heaven. A small whimper fell past Yuri's lips as the movements of Otabek's own sent sparks through his body. Otabek's lips were so soft and velvety and felt amazing against his own. Yuri so desperately wanted to feel more of them, and as if Otabek had read his mind, the elder's mouth lightly parted and a wet tongue ran along the seam of Yuri's lips.

Without hesitation Yuri parted his lips and invited Otabek in. It was sloppy at first; their tongues dancing along each other was such a new feeling to Yuri and he was too eager to feel more, taste more of Otabek. He stood up on his toes and wrapped his arms around Otabek's neck, drawing their bodies tightly against one another's, and Otabek's arms slipped around Yuri's waist to hold him up.

The heat coming from Otabek seeped through the layers of clothing separating them, spreading through Yuri's body via his veins and making every nerve more sensitive. It urged him on to be bolder and thrust Otabek's tongue back into his mouth and follow right after it with his own. A deep sound came from Otabek's throat and the hands on Yuri's waist tightened, and Yuri couldn't keep himself from smirking into the kiss as his tongue exploded every crevice.

Yuri could feel his body starting to react to their making out, small twinges of pleasure shooting down to his groin. As if on instinct, he lightly ground his hips against Otabek and moaned at the feeling. In return, Otabek broke the kiss with the sharp intake of a breath.

His eyes fluttered open and were met with the most gentle and kind gaze Otabek had ever given him. His dark chocolate eyes shone with happiness. Yuri had never seen his friend – friend? – like this before, but it made him hungry for more.

Instead, Otabek gently rubbed circles into the newly exposed skin of Yuri's waist. It was such a gentle touch that it instantly made him relax against Otabek and almost purr at the feeling.

"I love you, Yuri," Otabek whispered into the space between their lips.

 _"He wasn't joking,"_ was all Yuri could think for a moment. Otabek had done exactly what he'd said he was going to do: kiss him – truly and deeply kiss him – and speak the words Yuri had longed to hear for so long. There was only one reply Yuri could give.

"I love you too, you idiot," Yuri answered with the biggest, brightest grin on his face. In response, Otabek placed a soft, chaste kiss on Yuri's lips, as if their confessions wouldn't be valid without it.

Yuri gratefully accepted the short kiss, though he wanted more. Just kissing Otabek had turned him on, and he had the almost overwhelming need to feel more of Otabek's naked skin against him, not just the man's lips. But Otabek knew him too well, and very much against Yuri's desires, Otabek lightly pushed him back onto the soles of his feet with the strong hands still on Yuri's waist.

"Beka, I want you," Yuri whined as he was forced to release the grip he had around Otabek's neck. Otabek wasn't fair. He couldn't start something like this, just kiss him out of the blue, and then expect to not take it any further.

"Not tonight, Yura. But we will, I promise," Otabek whispered in response, his voice a little rough around the edges. A hand gently brushed Yuri's golden hair aside, and Yuri thought his heart would burst from love. He loved Otabek, he would do anything for him. Even putting aside his own carnal needs if Otabek wasn't ready for it yet.

"You should go home, Yura. It's late, I don't want your mom murdering me," Otabek continued with a small chuckle as his thumb lightly caressed Yuri's cheek.

Yuri sighed and reluctantly nodded. Even though his mother was at work most of the time, she would still get mad at him for being home only ten minutes late. "Fine, but I'm coming over tomorrow whether you like it or not."

"I know," Otabek responded as he flashed Yuri a smile. A tiny one, but a smile nonetheless, and it made Yuri's heart flutter.

With another small, quick kiss, Otabek released Yuri's waist and Yuri reluctantly let his arms fall away from Otabek's neck. He could have stayed like that for hours, gazing into Otabek's eyes, but Otabek was right: Yuri's mom would kill him. Not that he cared, but he didn't want Otabek to be blamed for things too. He was too good for that.

So with a light sigh Yuri turned and headed out the door, positively beaming. Finally. _Finally_ after all this time he was able to share the feelings he had for his friend. Though friend wasn't exactly the right word anymore after tonight.

 _"This makes him my boyfriend, right?"_ Yuri asked as he absentmindedly traced his lower lip with his thumb, the tender skin tingling at the reminder of Otabek's lips against them. Yuri was already a few apartments down the corridor when he heard Otabek call after him.

"Yura! Wait for me, okay?"

There it was again. That slight desperate tone that Otabek had used earlier that evening as well, when he had asked that strange question about him disappearing. It stirred something inside of Yuri, yet he couldn't quite place a finger on what it was. But it was probably best to leave it alone for now, and relish in the afterglow of their kiss and mutual confession.

Yuri turned around, his hands stuffed into the pockets of his jacket. "I'll always wait for you, Beka," Yuri beamed at his boyfriend. Otabek flashed him a bright grin, akin to how Yuri himself felt. Even from a distance and only lit by the light by the front door, he could see the redness of Otabek's cheeks.

Giving Otabek another fond glance, Yuri disappeared into the stair way and headed three stories down to where his own house was. It was quiet and dark, a small lamp in a corner of the living room the only light still on. Yuri's mom was already asleep on the couch. It was close to midnight already and she was generally exhausted when she came home from any of her jobs.

Silently Yuri made his way to the single bedroom, which his mother had let him have when they moved in all those years ago. The floor was littered with clothes, posters of his favorite bands and shows on the walls, leopard print sheets, and a bunch of pictures of him and Otabek hanging on the wall above his bed. It was probably a pretty average room for a sixteen year old.

Yawning, Yuri stripped out of his shoes, pants, and jacket, and curled up under his blanket, a small smile gracing his lips. For the first time in forever, he felt truly happy. And it was all because of Otabek. Meeting Otabek was the best thing that had ever happened in his life. Their time as friends had already been amazing, and he couldn't wait for what lay ahead of them as boyfriends. Snuggling into his pillow, it only took minutes for sleep to claim him, his dreams flooded with images of Otabek.

xxx

Yuri hummed as he made his way up the staircase of the apartment building. It was still rather early, only just before dinner time, but he just couldn't wait any longer to see Otabek. There were so many things he wanted to talk about, and at the same time he wanted to talk about nothing at all and just lie on the couch against Otabek's warm chest, stealing kisses whenever he pleased.

A pale hand reached up and knocked on the door. Yuri and Otabek never used the doorbell at either of their houses. It was their thing, ever since they were kids. Yuri was lightly puzzled why that ever became a thing in the first place now that he thought about it, and couldn't for the life of him remember. Yet as no reply came and the door stayed solidly shut, Yuri quickly became impatient and grabbed his copy of the front door key out of his pocket.

With a smirk, Yuri opened the door, expecting to see Otabek either coming out of the bedroom, bathroom, or making a meal in the kitchen. What he was greeted with instead, was silence and emptiness.

Otabek's whole apartment was empty.

Yuri's eyes widened as he rushed in, the door slamming shut behind him. Everything was gone. The leather couch they'd been sitting on, the dinner table and chairs, the TV on the wall. _Everything_. Down to the stupid plant Otabek had standing under the lamp in the corner of the room. Even the pictures that decorated the wall were gone. Pictures of Yuri and Otabek throughout the years, and of his family. Everything.

"Beka?" Yuri yelled out. Panic settled in as Yuri ran to the bedroom, his heart pounding against his ribcage. What was going on? Where did everything go? And more importantly, where was Otabek?

Yuri burst through the door of Otabek's bedroom, and found it exactly the same as the living room: completely empty. No unnecessarily neatly made bed, no cluttered desk, guitar or giant bookcase. No reading glasses on a nightstand. Just a bare room, as if no one had ever lived there.

As Yuri rushed to the kitchen, he noticed that even the empty pizza box from last night was gone. The fridge was empty too. With tears in his eyes and his breathing coming fast, Yuri even checked the bathroom. There wasn't even a toothbrush by the sink. The storage room next to the bathroom was completely void of anything as well.

"Beka!"

Again, no one answered. Because no one was there. With wide eyes Yuri stood in the middle of the living room, right where the sofa had been only last night, and looked around in desperation, in disbelief, his hair flying angrily around his face. What the _fuck_ was going on?

In a sheer moment of panic, Yuri looked at the front door, half expecting Otabek to barge through, playing this whole thing off as a joke. But Otabek didn't show. What he spotted instead, was a small piece of paper hanging just below the peep hole.

Yuri's knees were shaking lightly as he walked over and plucked the note from the door. It was folded in half, a picture of Yuri and Otabek stuck between the sides of the paper. It was a picture they'd taken only a few weeks ago, of the two of them snuggled together on the couch. Otabek's arm was loosely draped around Yuri's shoulders. They were wearing matching shirts with a tiger head on them – the same one he was wearing right that moment – and both of them had a goofy grin on their faces. It was a beautiful picture, especially after what had happened last night. But seeing it now, in the empty space of Otabek's apartment, it made Yuri's heart ache.

Taking in a shuddering breath, he folded the piece of paper open. Immediately Yuri recognized Otabek's messy handwriting right in the middle of it.

 _"Please wait for me. I love you.  
_ _-Beka."_ _  
_

A sickening sensation crept up through Yuri's stomach, up his chest, and came out as a small sob. Otabek was gone. The tears that had been stinging in the corners of his eyes spilled over and ran down his cheeks. _Otabek was gone_. And the bastard had known he was leaving too. It suddenly all made sense: Otabek's nervous, depressing behavior from the night before; the random question about disappearing; the sudden kiss. It all made sense now.

Yuri clasped his free hand over his mouth, muffling the cries that came from his throat. How dare Otabek just leave like that? Why even _fucking_ proclaim his love for Yuri when he knew he'd be gone the next day? Gone where, Yuri had no idea. Otabek had never mentioned that he had any intention of leaving. The thought made Yuri's eyes widen again. Did Otabek leave unwillingly? But then why was his entire apartment cleaned out as well? On second thought, _none of this made sense!_

Yuri's eyes skimmed over the note again as he wiped the tears from his eyes and took a few deep breaths to calm himself down. It didn't matter where Otabek was. Wherever he was, Yuri was convinced his boyfriend would turn up again some day soon. It didn't matter that the apartment was empty, Otabek would come back. Yuri just knew it. He _had_ to come back. Yuri couldn't even imagine the other possibility, he refused to give it any thought. Because Otabek would come back.

Clutching the piece of paper and picture to his chest, a new stream of tears rolled down his cheeks, small sobs escaping him before he could stop them.

"Of course I'll wait, you idiot," Yuri spoke into the empty, echoing space of the apartment, his heart breaking into pieces. "I'll wait however long it takes."

* * *

 **A/N:** I'm so sorry for the sad ending, but I promise you that everything will be fine!  
Let me know if you loved it/hated it 3

PunkyPenguin  
Proud member of the Otayuri Writers Collective on Tumblr


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N** : Welcome back for chapter two!  
Five years later, no one has still heard a thing from Otabek. Until..~

* * *

Absentmindedly, Yuri walked along the sidewalk of one of the busiest streets in Almaty. He was tired, hot, and sweaty, and he couldn't wait to get home. Summers in Almaty were always pretty hot; something that he felt like he should have gotten used to over the years, but hadn't. Even the iced coffee in his hand seemed to do nothing to cool his overheated body as the late afternoon's sunrays beat down on his marble skin.

Yuri could have easily taken a bus back from work, but he preferred the long, tiring walk home over being canned up in a bus with mutually hot, sweaty people. Especially after having to deal with people at work all day, Yuri felt like just one more word in his direction would make him explode. Of course, Yuri could have opted to get his driver's license, but having to drive from one end of the city to the other during rush hour didn't sound appealing. And motorcycles; yeah, those were not his thing either.

With a small flick of his wrist, Yuri pushed a few strands of his long hair away from his clammy forehead. He'd even braided the side of his hair to keep it partially out of his face, but the heat was unforgiving. He could not wait to get home, turn the air conditioning on, and take a long, cold shower. And one of the perks of living on his own, was that he could walk around freely in his underwear afterwards.

A few months after Otabek had disappeared, Yuri's mom had met the love of her life at the small restaurant where she waited the tables. Much to Yuri's surprise, the guy was a dentist and obviously pretty set in life. After they'd dated for about a year, he'd asked Yuri and his mom to move in with him, but Yuri had not-so-politely declined and refused to live anywhere but at the 'old' apartment. It had felt wrong to leave the block where he and Otabek grew up together. Leaving it behind would feel like he was giving up on Otabek ever returning. He wouldn't have been able to forgive himself.

Yet Otabek had been a sensitive subject during the past five years he'd been missing. Five years, two months, and eleven days, to be exact, but who was counting?

After Otabek's sudden disappearance, Yuri had tried everything within his power to find his boyfriend. He'd waited 48 nerve-wracking hours before going to the police to file a missing person report, explaining everything that had happened the night prior, apart from their kiss. The policemen had given him funny looks, since everything pointed to Otabek just grabbing his things and leaving, but Yuri had insisted that disappearing into thin air was something Otabek would never do. They'd made a meaningless promise of looking into it, but whenever Yuri would show up at the police station for an update, they'd always tell him the same thing: _"Sorry, we haven't been able to find anything yet, but we're doing our best."_

Even back then, Yuri had known they were lies, but having a sliver of hope was better than not having any hope at all. Though as time progressed and Otabek's family hadn't heard from him and it was starting to look more and more like Otabek Altin had simply vanished from the face of the earth, Yuri had lost that hope. The hope of ever seeing the man he loved again. It had sent him spiraling into depression, Yuri's mind and the memories of Otabek becoming a prison of his own making.

It wasn't until Yuri's mom and soon-to-be stepfather had forced him to see a psychiatrist and he had started taking medication for his mental issues, that he started feeling better. Slowly he had felt himself being pulled back from the darkness, feeling more motivated than ever. Even though Otabek hadn't returned, Yuri still believed that one day he would. And when Otabek would turn up at his doorstep, Yuri would be sure to show him that he could have a life of his own now, and take care of himself.

 _"I'll show him I'm fine on my own."_

Yuri had started working harder in all of his classes, and even got accepted into the university Otabek had enrolled at two years prior. Instead of leaving his future to chance, Yuri had decided to take it into his own hands and put his mind to a career in game design. All because Yuri had taken over Otabek's fanatic gaming habits as a way to forget his miserable, daily life, and because he wanted Otabek to be proud when he returned.

But Otabek hadn't returned. And each year Yuri's hope would slowly crumble until eventually there was barely any left, and life without Otabek had started to feel like a normal thing. Yet Yuri had never stopped loving him. Almost every day he would glance at the note and the picture Otabek had left for him. Some days he'd cry, other days he'd fondly recall the good times they'd had.

Despite awaiting his boyfriend's return, Yuri had felt himself moving on, though never enough to start a relationship with someone else. As he grew older and more mature, he'd gotten plenty of attention from both sexes, but Yuri had turned down every single request. If Yuri was honest, he'd never even met someone who interested him the way Otabek had. Though most of all, he'd wanted to stay true to the promise he had made with Otabek; he would wait. No matter how long it would take for Otabek to return, he'd wait.

A sigh fell past Yuri's lips as he reached a busy intersection. Lazily he kicked back his iced coffee while it was still cold. It only temporarily offered him some relief from the heat as the humidity made his skin clammy. Though as he looked around him, Yuri noticed he was one of the few people who seemed to be suffering. He stood out like a beacon amongst the tan skinned, dark haired mass with his long blonde hair and pale skin. No wonder he was suffering, Yuri's body literally wasn't built for this type of weather.

As the light turned green, Yuri idly moved along with the mass of people around him, eyes ahead so he wouldn't accidentally bump into someone. And that's when he saw him.

 _Him_.

Otabek Altin.

Yuri's eyes widened and his heart started beating faster. He wanted that guy across the street, slowly making his way towards him to be Otabek, but was that really him? He looked absolutely nothing like the Otabek Yuri remembered. But as they came closer towards each other and their eyes met by accident, that spark Yuri had felt all those years ago while kissing Otabek, reemerged, and Yuri just knew: _that_ was Otabek Altin.

A small smirk appeared around those familiar lips, Otabek's dark eyes almost sparkling in the afternoon's sun, and Yuri knew Otabek recognized him. Yet his smile and eyes were the only familiar features to Yuri. Otabek's hair was longer on the top, pulled back into a small bun, yet the bottom of it was shaved close to his head – an undercut, Yuri believed it was called – and some light stubble ran along the sharp lines of Otabek's jaw, turning into faint goatee on his chin. Even from the distance that still separated them, Yuri could see two black studs glistening in each of Otabek's earlobes, complementing the perfect, caramel skin. But what really caught Yuri's attention, were the clothes Otabek had on.

Tight, black jeans stretched up along Otabek's long legs, hugging his figure like a second skin. There were a few rips along the fabric above the knee, revealing just a few strips of the rich skin of Otabek's upper thigh. The black jeans were complemented by a leather jacket that hung loosely and unzipped from Otabek's shoulders, the light gray shirt he was wearing underneath showing through the gap. The outfit was completed with black, laced up biker boots that reached just a little over Otabek's ankles.

The whole look had Yuri stunned and he could barely believe that the bad boy making his way over to him was his innocent childhood friend, and had been his boyfriend for a day. Remembering the day they kissed suddenly seemed like a lifetime go. This Otabek was nothing like the cute, shy, and slightly insecure eighteen-year-old who had taken his first kiss. This Otabek; Yuri could feel the confidence radiating off him.

They met in the middle of the street, standing in front of each other almost chest to chest, and simply _stared_. There was nothing else Yuri could do but stare at his long-lost friend. So many questions were running through his head, that he couldn't find the voice for any of them. And maybe it was better that way, because despite the fluttering of his heart, he could also feel that cold anger from years ago bubbling to the surface. The anger that had followed the initial stage of crying, like he was grieving the loss of a loved one – which technically, hadn't been too far off.

"Beka," Yuri managed to whisper over the sounds of traffic in the distance and the murmur of people walking by, and already knowing the response he'd get.

"Yura," Otabek whispered back, his voice deep and sweet like it was dripping with the sweetest honey and would make all your dreams come true. _Fuck_ , that was not how Yuri remembered it.

Time seemed to be standing still, Otabek looking almost serene in the glow of the afternoon sun. Yuri found himself drowning in the chocolate pools of the man's eyes. Hesitantly Yuri opened his mouth to say something, _anything_ , when the loud honking of a car ripped him back to reality. Yuri's eyes snapped away from Otabek for a second, only to glare at the agitated driver of the rusty, dark green car just inches away from their legs.

Before Yuri could move, Otabek's large hand wrapped itself firmly around his upper arm and gently pulled him along to the sidewalk, where they continued their staring match – though this time in the comfort of the shade offered by the buildings along the road.

People walked past them, _pushed_ past them while Otabek's hand fell away from Yuri's arm and they only had eyes for each other. Instead of just holding Yuri's gaze, Yuri would sometimes catch Otabek running his eyes over the edges of his face and lingering on Yuri's lips. Despite the shivers it sent down Yuri's spine, his mind wouldn't stop reeling.

Why was Otabek here? Why was he back, after all this time? Where had he been? And why did he look like he belonged in a biker gang? Not that Yuri minded the new look, – quite the contrary, it stirred something inside of him that he hadn't felt in a long time – but the big question remained: why?

"We need to talk," Yuri said, voice still a little breathy from the overwhelming emotions of happiness, disbelief, and anger running through him. Though he figured that until he had heard the _exact_ reason for Otabek disappearing for over five years, he would settle for letting anger have the upper hand.

"I know. Do you want to go to your place?" Otabek asked as one of his hands dug into the pocket of that leather jacket. Much to Yuri's surprise, Otabek pulled out a package of cigarettes, flicked it open with his thumb, and took one of them between his lips. Lips that Yuri suddenly very vividly remembered against his own.

"Y-Yeah, let's do that," Yuri answered with a small stutter, and mentally cursed at himself for it. Yet he managed to keep his face straight, even when Otabek lit the cigarette hanging seductively from his lips and took a deep drag.

Silently they started walking, the two of them standing out of the crowd like a sore thumb. Only a few minutes into their walk, Yuri absentmindedly tossed his iced coffee into a trash can. The drink had most likely melted by now, and thinking about it, Yuri just wasn't in the mood for it anymore. Instead he kept stealing glances at the man walking next to him, how he casually took small drags from the shrinking stick of nicotine. How could anyone look so damn sexy while just smoking a cigarette?

Every now and then, their eyes would meet in a mutual attempt to peek at each other without the other noticing. The way Otabek would knowingly smirk made Yuri's stomach tingle and his cheeks flush pink. When Yuri was about to take a left turn, Otabek stopped him with a hand on Yuri's shoulder. With a small glare, Yuri looked up at him.

"What, did you forget the way to my house in all the years you were gone?" Yuri asked, the question as spiteful as he himself felt in that moment.

A mix of emotions flashed through Otabek's eyes for just a fraction of a second, and disappeared before Yuri could put a finger on what it was exactly. It had looked like guilt, but combined with something deeper.

"I could never forget," Otabek started with a serious voice, eyebrows lightly furrowed together. The frown was deeper than it had been at eighteen, Yuri noticed. "But my ride is parked here," Otabek nodded to _something_ behind Yuri.

Yuri frowned in response as his eyes drifted to where Otabek was looking, and spotted a black motorcycle right behind him, carefully parked in one of the designated spots along the side of the road. It was sleek, a combination of black and silver chrome, with the word 'Star' written on the side in graceful, golden letters. Yuri stared at it in awe, his aversion to that specific type of transportation instantly seeping away.

 _"Otabek? On a motorcycle?"_ Yuri wondered. What had happened to Otabek while he was gone? The Otabek Yuri remembered would have never even _thought_ about owning a motorcycle.

"Are you coming or not?" Otabek asked in that specific tone of his – questioning, but not truly leaving the answer up for debate – as he pulled a black helmet off the handlebar it was hanging from, and held it out to Yuri.

Mindlessly Yuri accepted the helmet and pulled it over his head, snapping the clasp shut beneath his chin. It was slightly on the big side – probably Otabek's helmet – and smelled like cigarettes and cologne. It was hot and almost suffocating, and he instantly felt his hair stick to the back of his neck.

Otabek had already situated himself on the bike and smirked back at Yuri as he climbed on the behind him, putting his feet on the paddles on each side. He'd never been on motorcycle before and for a second he wondered what he was supposed to hold on to, until something clicked in his mind and he hesitantly placed his hands on Otabek's leather-clad waist.

Vibrations hummed through every fiber of Yuri's being as Otabek started the engine and the metallic beast under them roared to life. It sent a rush of adrenaline shooting through his body, something he'd never felt quite like that before. And it felt amazing.

Throughout the ten minute ride to his apartment, the initial excitement of riding a motorcycle for the first time had worn off, and Yuri found himself ever so slightly leaning into Otabek. Solely for the purpose of having something to hold on to, _nothing more_. As Yuri breathed in the scent of smoke and leather, he let his mind wander, but consciously didn't let it drift too far. Just because Otabek was back now, didn't mean he would stay. It didn't even mean that he still felt the same way about Yuri as he had all those years ago. And Yuri would be damned if he allowed himself to hope for what he wanted the most; Otabek in his arms again. Yet deep down Yuri could feel that he was just as smitten with the man as he had been when they first kissed.

Silently, Yuri took the helmet off when they arrived, his hair sticking grossly to his neck and forehead. After Otabek had said what he wanted to say, he was going to need a shower. The annoying piece of head gear was shoved into Otabek's chest, who took it in his hands with a small _oof_ as Yuri started walking, trusting Otabek to follow. Without a word uttered, they made their way up the staircase of _their_ apartment building like they had done thousands of times before. Along the corridor they went, just three doors from the exit, and Yuri's pale hands fumbled nervously with the lock on the front door when he realized he had absolutely no idea what he was going to say to his long-lost friend.

Still in silence, they stepped right into the living room, the weight pressing down on Yuri's heart getting heavier by the second, even as a cool, air-conditioned breeze tickled along his heated skin. As soon as the door closed and Otabek followed, Yuri spun around, facing the still taller man – but only by an inch – with cold eyes. He could see Otabek visibly swallow. If looks could kill, Otabek would have been a dead man.

"Yura, I'm so-" Otabek started as he moved closer, hesitantly, but his sentence was cut short as Yuri lashed out without a second thought and unleashed every bottled-up emotion he'd felt over the past few years.

He slapped Otabek Altin across the face with his flat palm.

Hard.

The sharp sound filled the silence of the apartment as Otabek stared at Yuri, eyes wide. A tan hand came up to the burning, red mark, and Otabek hissed softly as his fingers brushed over the edges of the swelling palm print Yuri had left behind on his cheek.

"Where the _fuck_ have you been, asshole? I looked everywhere for you!" Yuri asked through gritted teeth, his hands clenched into tight fists at his side. How dare Otabek even try to tell him he was sorry? _He_ was the one who left, he had no right to apologize.

A dejected look settled on Otabek's face, and he lowered his eyes to the floor as Yuri kept his piercing green eyes trained on him.

"Please, can we sit down? I'll explain everything to you, I promise," Otabek breathed out with a sigh. His voice sounded as defeated as he looked.

With a sharp turn on his heels, Yuri spun around. His right hand was stinging painfully, though it was barely a noticeable compared to how heavy his heart felt.

"Fine, you have ten minutes."

Yuri sat down on his light gray, plush linen couch and crossed his arms over his chest. His eyes rolled up to Otabek, who followed him and sat beside him, but made sure to keep a certain amount of distance between himself and Yuri. It made Yuri feel slightly better, knowing that Otabek didn't instantly try to invade his personal space.

"I better start at the beginning then," Otabek sighed as he leaned forward, placing his forearms on top of his thighs and staring at the small, white coffee table in front of them. "Remember how a few months before I left, I told you I needed more time to study?"

Yuri nodded and hummed softly in understanding. Of course he remembered. Otabek had told him he needed more time to focus on his exams, so he could enroll at the university of his dreams. But now Yuri had the suspicion that all of it had been a lie.

"That wasn't exactly true. Not the whole truth, anyway," Otabek continued, his words thoughtfully picked out. "A week or so before that, I saw something. I've always known we lived in a pretty bad part of town, but I never knew _how_ bad until then."

"What?" Yuri couldn't keep the curiosity out of his voice and for just a second, he hated himself for it.

Otabek frowned and Yuri could see the tightening around his eyes. Besides mind-numbingly hot, he looked tired. A twinge of regret shot through Yuri's soul as he realized that maybe the past years hadn't been easy on Otabek either.

"I was walking home from guitar class one night and took the shortcut I always took. But as I turned a corner, there was a loud bang. Like, deafening, you know?" For a second Yuri's and Otabek's eyes met, and Yuri was not prepared for the haunted look he saw in them. Breathlessly he nodded, and Otabek turned his gaze back towards his hands.

"Anyway, the bang was a gunshot, and when I took a turn around the corner I saw it happen. I saw the two guys trying to carry the dead body away, and they spotted me. I bolted, ran straight home, and I went to the police the day after. Turned out that the two guys had been on their radar for a while, but the cops had never been able to pin anything on them until then. But me being a witness to a murder, you know, had kind of put a target on my back."

Otabek took a moment to breathe as he spoke like he had told the story a thousand times already. All Yuri could do was look at him in silence, eyes slightly widened in disbelief.

"So... the cops wanted me to be a crown witness in the trial against them and the gang they were a part of. But since they'd seen me, lawyers thought it was best to put me in witness protection until after the trial," Otabek continued with a heavy voice, and turned his gaze to Yuri when the blonde stayed silent.

"Yuri, I didn't have a choice in the matter, I was going to end up dead if I'd stayed. That night before I left... I meant everything I said. I couldn't leave without telling you how I really felt about you..."

Yuri remained silent, his eyes locked with Otabek's and searching for a lie in those beautiful, chocolate colored eyes. But all he found, was truth. Yuri had always been able to tell when Otabek was lying – or so he had thought – but in that moment, all he could see was the sincerity in the man's eyes and the look on his face. It made Yuri's heart race and left icy chills running down his spine, knowing that the man he loved had been in such a position. A sudden rush of guilt filled him now that he knew the truth, – maybe he shouldn't have slapped him – yet it still took his brain a while to process the information, and silence hung between them.

"Fuck, Beka, I don't know what to say. That's just messed up," Yuri gasped out after a few minutes of silence.

"Yeah, tell me about it. I got sent to some shithole village in the countryside where I was taken care of by some very nice people. But I had to finish high school online, had to give up everything. I never even went to university after I graduated, so I started working in the bike shop they owned instead," Otabek lightly chuckled, and some tension seemed to visibly seep out of him.

"Well, that explains the new look," Yuri scoffed as he let his eyes roll over Otabek's form, and couldn't help but shake his head as a small smirk found its way to Otabek's lips.

"What, you like?" The elder asked with a lightly teasing tone in his deep voice, causing Yuri to roll his eyes.

"I do, but that's beside the point now," Yuri started, and his voice turned serious, "Beka, you said you loved me; you told me to wait. Did you mean it?"

Otabek lightly nodded and shifted in his spot, body turning slightly towards Yuri. "Like I said, Yura, I meant everything. I loved you; I _still_ love you. Not a day went by where I didn't think about you or wondered how you were doing."

The pain was audible in his voice, and it made Yuri's throat clench. Despite everything, he'd been on Otabek's mind the whole time, just like Yuri never went to sleep without reading the note and kissing the picture that Otabek had left behind.

"I was pretty messed up after you disappeared, honestly," Yuri confessed with a light shrug of his shoulders, causing his loose scoop-neck shirt to slide down one of his pale joints. There was no point in hiding the truth about how horrible he had felt. "Nothing pills couldn't fix though."

"I'm so sorry, Yura. I will never be able to make up for what I put you through," Otabek responded and tentatively placed a hand on the bend of Yuri's knee.

The feeling of that large, warm hand on his leg sent a heat rushing through Yuri's body that tinged his cheeks pink. It was just like the first time they'd kissed, how his body had responded to the feeling of Otabek back then. His heart ached with longing for the man in front of him; still, even after all these years. Yuri needed him back in his life more than he had allowed himself to feel over the past years. How Otabek could fit in his life, was a problem to be figured out later. For now, he had to start small.

"You could start by giving me a hug, idiot," Yuri smiled teasingly as he turned his body towards Otabek as an invitation.

Otabek didn't waste another second as he pulled Yuri against him, wrapping his strong arms around the blonde. Yuri couldn't keep from immediately snuggling into the broad chest in front of him, his nose digging into the leather of Otabek's jacket while his pale hands snuck underneath it and trailed lightly up Otabek's back. _This_ was his home, in Otabek's arms – even though they he felt so much sturdier than years ago.

Yuri's eyes slipped shut as he let the feeling of having his friend back sink in. It was overwhelming. He'd longed for it for years, been deprived of it for so long, and now his deepest wish had suddenly come true. He wasn't sure how to handle it. He'd never been good at dealing with such strong feelings, anger always his way of protecting himself, but Yuri was way past being angry with Otabek. He wanted to hug, kiss, cuddle; anything to make him feel like this wasn't a dream, and Otabek wouldn't disappear from his arms again. He wouldn't be able to handle it again.

"I waited, you know? I got your note and waited for you all this time," Yuri breathed softly, voice barely louder than a whisper as he wondered when the _hell_ he had started crying.

Otabek rubbed soft circles into Yuri's back, only softly humming in response. Their cheeks brushed together, and ever so slowly Otabek pulled Yuri closer, held him tighter. Yuri responded by positioning himself in Otabek's lap, one slender, jean-clad leg on either side of him.

With a soft brush against the back of his head, Otabek caught Yuri's attention and made him look up. Otabek smiled tenderly. The warm hand glided over Yuri's skin and a thumb brushed away a runaway tear.

"I know, Yura. And I'm not going anywhere ever again, I'm here to stay if you'll have me," Otabek whispered, eyes locked with Yuri's.

The swirl of emotions Yuri caught in them took his breath away. Softly he trailed his fingertips through the soft undercut of Otabek's hair. "Of course, you idiot."

With a content hum, Yuri closed the distance between them and sealed their lips together. It was as if all the pieces of a puzzle suddenly fell into place and the world fell away. The kiss was soft and slow, more comforting than words would ever be. All worries evaporated from Yuri's thoughts, and for the first time in forever, his mind was locked onto the present – here and now with Otabek, their tongues dancing together like they'd been acquainted all their lives. It felt like a new beginning, a promise of so much more to come.

Drunk on endorphins all Yuri wanted was to touch, kiss, lick, and hold every part of Otabek. To feel those firm muscles against him; to have that tanned body move in ways that blended them together perfectly. The soft caresses of tongue and hands quickly became more firm, more needy, and Yuri relished in the feeling of Otabek's quickening breath that matched his own.

With a soft whimper Yuri pulled away, his fingers digging softly into the base of Otabek's neck, while Otabek's hands were equally busy grasping Yuri's slender hips, the thumbs barely sneaking underneath Yuri's loose t-shirt. The simple touches had Yuri curling his back like a kitten and purring out the words he'd been longing to say for years.

"Beka, I'm done waiting." 

* * *

**A/N:** Like I promised, everything would be okay ^^  
Let me know what you think! Next chapter will contain the smut I've been dying to write :D


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